my life

well i'm just observing...many things...how ppl hav developed d traits of backstabbing...how ppl hav developed themselves 2 b sole oppurtunistic...how 1 person is betraying d other in a relation?...trying 2 b polite 2 d ppl who detest me..smiling wid d ppl who r synonymous 2 sweet poison...observing d camouflageous nature of ppl around me..observing d sort of ppl who even wont bother whether a person beside him/her is abt 2 die,they vl b busy wid der own asses...how ppl wont look down upon their ragged,dusty,smelly poor brethren...they thmselvs gulp n waste luxurious cuisines but wont spend a penny as alms 2 d poor...how they wear branded clothes n famous designerware,but wont provide a sweater 2 a poor boy freezing 2 death in d chilled winters...how d rich xploit d poor,,,looking down upon as if they hav conquered d whole earth n treat them as some unearthly creatures...trying 2 decipher d complex n various forms of so called infamous human beings...i'm just observing as a spectator dis game of lif...since my limbs hav been tied up n mouth has been gagged...this is my life...wot is urs?

Somtimes I Wonder....

love is the best thing that can happen in a person's life, or may be the worst. love itself is an anomaly of life. when a person says "I LOVE YOU",does he/she really mean it? or is it a random lull momentary expression. if "i love you" itself was not enough, "i love u foreverrr" is another illusionary/bluffing expression blurted out.

if your love is a success, fine, you are the luckiest person and your life attains flamboyancy. but if you arent successful, your life has been backfired. your life runs on the notes of agony for atleast a while. before getting committed in a relation, just make it sure that it is the right person you are with ,otherwise i think one is doing the most obnoxious thing in life and placing his/her life in a precarious situation.

when in a relation,someone dumps the other one usually. i just want to know their psychology that comes into the picture during that period. do they at all have a remorseful feeling when they are doing this to the other? or is it just a random reckless decision without pondering the consequences. do they atleast feel pity for the other person???
only he/she who have done this can answer the above questions precisely.

the most forgettable moment comes when the other says ,"IT's ALL OVER". your heart starts beating fast,your head starts spinning,everything seems eerie-weerie,the moment seems disordered,u might even blurt out,"what the f***?",you will wish you werent there with your hands n legs shaking,you will wish you hadnt heard those last 3 words and it was a bad and cynical dream which was never meant to protrude into reality.

but when "it's all over",the other person's statement is apt. he/she means it. and you have been left with the scars of that atrocious relation. it's natural that we are so called human beings and at some point we break down and tears are shed for that someone,when we are noone in their lives anymore.and just say,how many eons are you going to sit and shed tears???

i think it is a tumult waste of time,thinking about that someone,who was never yours. its the absolute truth. there is no point pinning the hope that they may come back. no one is going to come back for you mate, and its high time you move ahead in life ,otherwise, you will get run over by life if you cease to move.

there are also a genre of depressing scums who like to live in that web of agony,distress,and like to entangle their lives with that so-called depression due to a powerful love failure.soorry,i'm being just a bit scornful.but they start living the life of loners. the world is at one end and they are at the opposite. i have met quite some of them. nothing seems to penetrate their thick skulls. what you say seems abominable to them.they want to reside in the world of mirages and want to hum and listen to those moronous filmi songs for the rest of their lives.

giving your life again a jolt and setting it up in motion is fine,but those feelings and emotions which we possessed for that someone,where do they go and what do you do about it?sometimes those peculiar good memories come back and you still wish this shouldnt have happened and why did this happen to me only?well,i havent got any answers for the above and i myself feel mislead by the experience.

well,love is a part of life,but not life itself. the only respite is to move ahead and accept the fact that everything happens for a reason. and hopefully someone better is awaiting us on the path of life ahead.... :):):)

Taare Zameen Par...

i think this ought to be the best movie of 2007.aamir khan once again gives us an elegant cult classic post RDB. but the child artist darsheel safary steals the show.i fell in love with taare zameen par when the promos were being aired in the music channels.well,after watching the movie,i'm left for words.

the movie's central character is eshaan awasthi(played by darsheel safary)this lad of 8or9 years carries the show with elan.eshaan is just like any other normal child.he is notorious,playful,lethargic to go to school,dreamy.but apart from this eshaan possesses a creative talent in painting.but young eshaan becomes vulnerable when it comes to studies.he fetches poor grades,whereas the boys of his age are able to scrape through good grades.the teachers have the conception that eshaan is a dumb git and he gets punished for his insincerity in studies.but even after the punishments there is no improvement in his studies.his father has enough f his impotence in studies and lands up him a boarding school.

but young eshaan still continues to fare in the same way in studies.he has to bear the tantrums and scoldings of his teachers.it is then the arts teacher ram kumar nikumbh(played by aamir) comes to his rescue.he notices the repeated pattern of mistake that eshaan makes and concludes that the lad is suffering from dyslexia.

Dyslexia is a specific learning disability that manifests primarily as a difficulty with written language, particularly with reading and spelling. dyslexia results from differences in how the brain processes written and/or verbal language. Although dyslexia is the result of a neurological difference, it is not an intellectual disability. Dyslexia occurs at all levels of intelligence, average, above average, and highly gifted.

the director (aamir) beautifully portrays the resentments eshaan has to face being an unlucky victim of dyslexia.there is no one to listen to his woes.there is no one to inquire why eshaan is incapable to study like a normal child of his age.eshaan undergoes the criticism,scoldings and his morale and self confidence is blown into pieces.but the child faces and undergoes the resentments without raising a voice.he also ceases to paint which he wa so good at.

it is then the arts teacher who decides the uphill task of curing the boy's learning disabilities.the film also gives the examples of renowned geniuses lik einstein,edison,picasso,da vinci who also had learning disabilities in their childhood.the rest of the movie showcases how the arts teacher helps him in overcoming his learning disabilities.he helps in building up the confidence of eshaan back and eshaan also gets back in doing at what he was best at(painting).there is a painting competition held in the school and eshaan comes out as a winner of the event.to the surprise of his father , eshaan manages to score well in his academics too.

there is a strong message from this movie. one should not stress a child above the limit which he can't sustain.one should also try to know the problems of the child with love and affection rather thandetesting the child.and of course every child has a special talent in him/her which we ought to tap and give it a proper direction.and before ending,i would say every child is special and so is Taare Zameen Par....

my rating out of 5: ****

acknowledgement to the anonymous(october 3rd,2004)

sometimes i just suddenly wake up from my sleep in midnight with my whole body soaked in perspiration. this behaviour has become synonymous since the last 3 years 3 months. the last 39 months has been a period of repent and resentment. 39 months back into the past,i still remember that day october 3rd,2004. that day ought to be my most memorable day. whether i had a painful torture or painless serenity on my face,it didnt matter anymore. everything had come to an end. the day october 3rd has etched its place in my memory forever. the anonymous being might have forgotten the date or me, but the lesson i learnt that day might be helpful in the future, but even then i will always have to carry the burden of despair over my shoulders.

darkness slowly crept the horizon of life. everything seemed motionless. the whole world seemed to have been shaded in gray. even today while typing for my blog, i feel some part of me had gone dead/numb on the eve of oct3, even the times could not replenish my lost part. one of the many things the anonymous being's desertion taught me was that one should not take anything for granted, it might be a material thing or a human being. one should understand or give worth to a person's value when he/she is around you rather than repenting after the loss. and there are some serene things the god makes for you, but if you lose that thing of eternity, you have lost it forever. i would like to thank that anonymous being for inculcating in me the moral qualities and making me realise my mistakes.

i know that i have lost you forever, may be oneday you will go through my blog and will be content to see your bodhisatta as a changed human being that you wanted him to be.

opulence 2008

in the serene month of january,

comes the fest of intelligentsial mercury,

hail the arrival of opulence,

the mother of intellectual extravagance.

your art of thinking will be put to test,

the supreme will outwit the rest,

and will win the plaudits of being the best.

innovation is the root of excellence,

and being the epitome of triumph's fragrance,

the innovators in the waging war will flourish,

and the rest are doomed to perish.

speak out the ideas with eloquence,

the rest will be history and penance,

let the orator in you rise,

and your name shall be immortalized.

the gladiators will eventually fight out,

in the engrossing cerebral war,

the last man standing is the czar,

his name shall be etched amongst the stars.

my wait for her

The streams of despair kept flowing,
Strolling towards the vortex of catastrophe,
The winds ceased to flow,
Engrossed in the merciless mist.

Insides of me grew colder,
As my wait for her grew older,
The sky had lost its blue,
Amidst the gray clouds.

Life resembled meager waves,
But it didn’t seem naïve,
My wait for her,
Plunged me in a race against time.

The green of me was lost,
Snatched by the passed eons,
Days ahead seemed like stained frost,
Drawing me to wait for her.

Days had come to an end,
The death vanquished my time,
I smiled and embraced the life’s rhyme,
And on the notes of loneliness my wait ended.

the dead prostitute

i stroll down the withering footprints,
where the remains of autumn lie,
the sands of time have done their toll,
the twilight resurrects with pessimism.

i walk past the withering grave,
lost in the vestige of times,
the soul which couldn't break,
the shackles of paranoia.

she has deceased in the remnants of time,
screwed by the love-stricken,
lost the soul instead for lust,
her existence had drooped away.

life had become a jeopardy,
when the flower didn't bloom,
the sun didn't shine,
the twilight took away the chastity,
in the times that have strolled away.

the bosoms lost for life's perils,
no one could juxtapose the body and soul,
the blood in her veins have ceased,
but memoirs remains in the sands.

getting scorched night after night,
to subdue existence's perils,
the winged life despoiled,
can't live anymore in
eternity's sunrise.

what life meant to be,
what had it become,
the wheel of life goes on,
but still actuated to liquidate
the body and soul.

the soul shrivelled in morsels,
left solitary in the yard,
the course of love didn't
run in her lane,
love is the fart of every heart,
which the mills of the gods,
never destined it for her.

her leaves trimmed to contours,
covered in winter with daisies,
the dead don't die,
death is nothing at all,
it doesn't count.

for in that sleep of death,
what dreams may come,
she lays solitary in the yard,
lost in the vestige of times.